But I never had any of those things in the first place, and I like the label "gay" just fine... Can we just give away the crap and keep the name? I never wanted any of it anyway; I think I inherited it.
Maybe a garage sale... If we made some money we could use it to redecorate with something a little less trendy and outre.
It could be that I sidestepped a lot of the pop-culture baggage associated with being gay because I came out so late (28) and was always more mild & lazy than wild & crazy anyhow. I mean, hell, I listen almost exclusively to acoustic music, and I'm wearing Hanes briefs as we speak (so to speak).
BTW, hi, Macro, I met you at Short Mountain last year. Or maybe it was the year before; I forget.
Maybe a garage sale... If we made some money we could use it to redecorate with something a little less trendy and outre.
It could be that I sidestepped a lot of the pop-culture baggage associated with being gay because I came out so late (28) and was always more mild & lazy than wild & crazy anyhow. I mean, hell, I listen almost exclusively to acoustic music, and I'm wearing Hanes briefs as we speak (so to speak).
BTW, hi, Macro, I met you at Short Mountain last year. Or maybe it was the year before; I forget.
posted by:
|
Columbus
|
-
Re: Reading the tribe description...
Wed, April 27, 2005 - 9:40 PMYou've got the spirit down. I think we're on the same page. -
-
Unsu...
Re: Reading the tribe description...
Wed, May 11, 2005 - 12:37 PMi remember watching the film version of tales of the city and at one point some business man says that homosexuals stole their word that means happy. my first response was: you can have it back!!! i knew i was sexually attracted to other boys when i was 13 years old, and i came out when i was 17. i never ever liked the word gay. i'm not bisexual, i'm a total homo. if any one likes the word gay then good for them, you can identify however you want. to me, gay not only means what has been written in the tribe description, it also means bears, leather queens, the wills and jacks, those "queer" (?) as folkers. queer is an umbrella term that i fall under but it hardly describes my sexual leanings without a person making as many assumptions as if i called myself gay. gay does not describe me, nor does it really describe a man who has sex with another man, or a woman who has sex with another woman. gay is a whole culture into itself. also- i am not "straight acting" what ever that is suppose to mean, nor do i act "gay", if that makes any sense- it doesn't for most people...
an example- from kids in the hall, there is a skit where all the secretaries are trying to figure out if the new guy is gay. i guess i'm like that- where unless i told you i'm a homo, people would have a hard time figuring it out.
-
-
Unsu...
Re: A Rose by any other Name
Sat, February 18, 2006 - 2:48 AMLabels are a tricky thing. People are always telling me, "You can't be Republican and Gay." or "How can you be Gay and not like John Waters?". I'm as gay as anybody I've ever met. Maybe it's just the "Gay" that throws them off.
I met a guy and took him home with me one night. Things happened pretty much as I expected them to happen, and the next morning he noticed some Gay bumperstickers on the back of my Mercedes. "How come you didn't tell me you were Gay?" he asked me. He was disappointed because he thought he'd caught himself a straight guy.
I had a friend in the Navy who kept getting into fights. I asked him, "Why do you keep getting into fights with these assholes?" He said, "Man, they said you were Gay! I wasn't going to let them get away with that." He almost cried when I told him I was Gay, and he needed to stop defending me.
I'm sorry people have such a hard time accepting that I'm Gay. I think it's time for me to give it away. I'm just a guy who likes guys. That's all. -
-
Re: A Rose by any other Name
Thu, September 6, 2007 - 3:20 AMI hear you on that one. I am just a guy who likes guys here too. I mean I work in a macho environment where I bust knuckles and bleed and sweat and my apartment looks like a normal bachlor pad and I don't own any DG (insert name brand associated with gay) anything. I listen to to whatever is on the radio and don't give a crap what other people think. My neighbor tried to hook me up with her sister. Gay has a lot of crap that is suppose to go along with it. I used to live in Atlanta and tried to live the "gay" lifestyle. (bumper stickers included), but I prefer living a more normal relaxed life where I don't have to worry about when gay pride is or what the gay day is at six flags. Who cares!! -
-
Re: A Rose by any other Name
Thu, September 6, 2007 - 6:36 AMInteresting discussion, guys. If you really want to feel isolated in the gay community, go out and contract HIV. I do still see myself as gay, but I do not follow fashion trends, I am not about money, prestige, power or perceived status. I am just me. Maybe Sarah Silverman coined the right term. I am now a "Me-mosexual" and I have lived with HIV for 22 years.
The reality as I see it is not that the label "gay" is bad. Hell, we fought for it for years to get rid of the more clinical "homosexual". This linguistic game reminds me of the all too serious situation in the African-American community where I have watched it change from the ever horrible N-word of the early 1960s to "colored people" to "blacks" to "African-American". If it empowers any of us to be called by our own name, then so be it.
I personally feel that we run the risk of schism from our common goals if we label ourselves into too many small communities. If, however, those communities are distinct and not just a result of a label, then that is valid. If we aren't careful, though, we will find ourselves wearing our labels like the latest fashion trend. -
-
Unsu...
Re: A Rose by any other Name
Thu, September 27, 2007 - 5:13 PMI had rejoined Tribe recently (I was on a couple years ago and then unsubscribed).
It is funny reading what I wrote a couple years ago- especially as I still agree with every thing I wrote.
Not only do I not identify with the word gay, I downright hate it. Look at yourself in the mirror and say the word gay. It looks like a fake smile. But whatever.
I never fought for the word, and I prefer the "clinical" homosexual, at least until people are no longer labelled by their orientations or preferences. And that means that when some one asks you who you sleep with, it is like asking you what your favorite color is, or what your favorite thing to eat is. Unfortunately, we are a very long way from those future times.
I also have no desire to "go out and contract HIV"- not to say any thing bad about people with HIV or those who are doing outreach to help prevent it.
And it is not that I "really want to feel isolated in the gay community". It is not like I am actually trying hard to not be "gay". My father is Hispanic and my mother is Asian; I don't "want to feel isolated" from Mexicans or Chinese, but unfortuntely, I don't really relate to one or the other.
The word "gay" is not accurate. It does not even really mean "happy" as in content or joyful. Such as- your best friend gets an award you don't say "Oh I feel so GAY for you!" Or if you get a great present from a loved one: "Oh this makes me so GAY!" It means festive and colorful.
Sarah Silverman is a total racist. -
-
Re: A Rose by any other Name
Fri, September 28, 2007 - 7:12 AMIt is cool we can all be who we want to be and think of it as we wish. I think that is important. I do have to wonder how much the debate of labels involves self-loathing, even if on a subconscious level. Most happy people are too busy being happy to care what people call them. Perhaps our "gay" community has become so morphed into straight society that we do not see it anymore as a reflection of our own souls.
I see the "inclusive" gay community in my hometown and am happy for the ability of each individual to express him/herself as pleases them, but I do not feel as connected to them now as I do to people my own age or to people who are living with HIV/AIDS no matter what their sexuality. I have found this to change over time and with the changes in the community and within myself. It is all fluid. However, my label for myself has not changed.
Does this argument for individuality of labels affect community? Do you feel connected to others in this society who are not "gay"? How do you build clout for political and social gain in a society that doesn't care what we call ourselves much less whether we have access to equal rights?
I am not being argumentative, just honestly perplexed about the importance of this issue. -
-
Unsu...
Re: A Rose by any other Name
Fri, September 28, 2007 - 11:41 AMI forgot to add above that the person who wrote the second response was me.
"Self- loathing"? That may be true for others who don't like the word gay, like Mark Simpson and Jack Malebranche. I am happy with my sexuality, and I am happy with myself except in cases where I realize that I am not doing enough for myself; but then, laziness has nothing to do with who I sleep with, now does it? I guess that would also go for a person who fights hard to not be called homosexual because it is too clinical- does that mean that every one who calls themselves gay are self-loathing because they don't like being called homosexual?
However, I do have to say that I envy you for being around so many happy people who are "too busy being happy to care what people call them". It would be nice to be around all those happy people. And it would be fun to call them all kinds of horrible names so as to be impressed at how it does not affect their happiness in any way. I also must say that when the young African-American male called me the N-word the other day, I was way to amused to correct him on my ethnicity. Maybe I was just feeling so gay at the moment...
I guess it is really important to a lot of people as to whether they are portray in an accurate light towards others. The basis of that might be fear of discrimination or prejudice that might endanger them or interfere with their abilities to get their basic needs taken care of. A healthy understandable fear is not the same as self-loathing. It just seems like almost every one on this thread has some how diverted the point of this particular tribe toward something else.
-
-
-
-
-
